Man Up Monday: New York Knicks

This is starting to feel like deja vu. But if the New York Knickerbockers are going to continue to embarrass themselves, I’m going to continue to talk about it.

Just to keep it real before I launch in here, let me acknowledge the fact that the Knicks are a lot better than they were next year. They have been really bad for that last 8 years or so. They made it through the Starbury era, the Isiah Thomas era, they bottomed out the squad to take a shot a LeBron and missed out on that, and now they have put all their chips in with Amare and Melo.

You know what? I actually don’t have a problem with the Knicks today. Sure, they got swept the hell up out of the playoffs faster than any other team in the league today. Sure, they let the no big man, old ass Celtics squad beat them down like they didn’t belong in the playoffs in the first place. But the Knicks are actually on the road back. They can actually fill up MSG, people actually care about the games, and they have a marketable star or two. I want to talk about Knicks fans though.

The Knicks fan is an extension of the New Yorker. I’m not talking about the celebrity Knicks fans who sit on the floor and barely pay attention. I’m talking about the average New Yorker. These are the most ridiculous people on the planet. They talk about NY like the rest of us give a damn, and they think their own situation is go great, that the rest of us have studies the intricacies of New York and are supposed to actually understand what they are talking about.

True Story:

I’m in New York, in Manhattan, literally on Broadway downtown walking around and ready to take the train uptown. It is summertime, so it is nice outside. People are wearing short sleeved shirts, women are in skirts. It is a great day in NY. So I start looking for the nearest train station and can’t find one and don’t see on e close. So I do what any rational person would do, I ask the nearest person for directions.

Brock: “Excuse me. Do you know where the train station is?”

NY: “Do I know where the train station is? What does my tattoo say?”

At this point I know I’ve asked the wrong person. I’m caught up in this New York attitude B.S. already.

Brock: “Uhhhh. The Bronx”

Yes, dude had a full forearm tattoo that said “BRONX” all the way up his arm.

NY: Dasrite son. I’m from the Bronx.

Brock: That’s great. What does that have to do with the question.

NY: I’m from the freaking Bronx, of course I know where the train station is.

[uncomfortable pause - literally and figuratively]

Brock: You gonna tall me or not player?

See, that’s the NY bullshit. Did this dude really rep his hood on walking directions to the train?

Which brings me to Knick fan.

You have to love the downward spiral they experienced over the last week and a half. From the Knicks actually being competitive. To Carmelo saying “all the Celtics did was hold serve on their home court”, to the full on bailout of the Knicks being better next year. Well, it will have to be next year because this year is over.

At this point, the Knicks fans are just rooting against the Denver Nuggets. I would be embarrassing it would be if the Nuggets made it farther than the Knicks. Luckily the Nuggets look like they will join the Knicks any day now.

Knicks fan…Man Up! You team still sucks, you still need at least one more piece, and at least two years before you will be competitive. So while the Knicks still suck, why don’t you go ahead and turn down the rhetoric. Thanks.

-Brock

 

My Second Favorite Michael Jackson Tribute

I’m sad to see Michael Jackson go, I’m glad that he was able to dominate the Billboard charts one last time once he went out, but I have to say that I like the Michael Jackson tributes most of all.  No, I’m not talking about Mr “can you keep a secret” singing a turrible version of “You are not Alone” in the skreets of LA.

Damn, that was awful.  On the other hand, this is great.  Reverend Al Sharpton has been showing another side in his Michael Jackson tribute.  I should have known from the hair that Rev Al keeps it pimpin, but now we’ve got stone cold evidence.

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Haaaaaaaa. Rev getting it in with somebody’s moms in a denim dress.  Really putting it on her too.  I think this is banned in most middle schools right now.

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AHHHHHHHH.  She’s backing it up in those Stan Smith Adidas too.  She wont put down that Louis bag either.

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Now, I wish I had the video of this one.  Is he pumping it around in a circle, or doing the classic Michael Jackson leg kick?  All I know is, he looks like he’s saying “You don’t know nothing bout that right there bwoy!”

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I really don’t know what is going on here.  All I can imagine is him saying “Hi Ms. Parker” Like Smokey and Craig.  I can actually see him saying “when you gonna let me f*ck Ms. Parker?” too.  I guess Spike couldn’t take it.

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Spike Lee is still Doin da butt?  Somebody tell Spike that it isn’t 1988.

-Brock