Worst. Arrest. Ever. The OTHER Side of the NBA

Everyone thinks pro athletes have it easy. Everyone thinks once you make it to the NBA your life is set. Fame, million dollar contracts, free stuff everything. Sure, we all hear about the big meltdowns. The guys who earned $120 million over the course of their career who end up getting their yachts repossessed, but there are dudes who just slide out of the back of the league and no one even notices. [Read more...]

Come On Bruh! Dwyane Wade

I’ll keep this brief. Dwyane…this is unacceptable.

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Jason Collins Comes Out of the Closet…And He’s Bringing His Brother With Him!

So Jason Collins is being hailed as the first gay athlete in major sports after he publicly came out in Sports Illustrated magazine. I don’t think I’ve actually heard anyone call him the “gay Jackie Robinson” yet. [Read more...]

Deandre Jordan: The Best Part of That RIDICULOUS Dunk

Everyone has seen the DeAndre Jordan dunk by now. But…
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Steve Francis Sets a New NBA Record After Retirement

Steve Francis was an explosive player for the Rockets back in the day. Although he was a Maryland Terp, I’m not gonna lie, he was a beast. Here is some of his best work if you need a refresher.
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Remember Greg Oden?

Now that football season is over, I’ve turned my attention to the NBA. I started paying attention when I saw this story cross the wire. Remember Greg Oden? The guy who got picked number one over Kevin Durant? The guy who has played about as many NBA games as me since then because his bones are made of Jolly Ranchers and wicker? Apparently there are real squads looking at trying to pick Oden up for the rest of the season. The Heat, the Celtics, they are all trying to give him workouts to see if he can make the squad.

I don’t know who will land him. I don’t know what he will contribute. But I know what I’ll call him.

There’s no way this is working out, but it is a proof that the most valuable thing in the NBA is the extra two inches between 6’10” and 7’0″. Because there is no good reason for anyone to be looking for Greg Oden right now.

If Greg Oden signs prepare for a tinkling sound in 5…4…3…2…

-Brock

 

Michael Jordan Literally Gets Arrested By the Fashion Police

It finally happened. After years of horrendous outfits. Michael Jordan finally wore an outfit so terrible it caused people to roll up on him and remove him from the premises. I actually don’t know how it took this long. We talked about MJ in mom jeans years ago. His dollars earned to turrible outfit ratio is completely off the charts. Let’s look at today’s violation.

Now I’ve been known to rock some camo shorts myself, but his actually look like they are literally golf course camo. If you were in the Army and you had to take the enemy down on a par-5 dog leg this is what you would wear if you wanted to go stealth mode on em. The only thing that could make that lime green shirt look worse is if he actually went full old man style and buttoned that top button. Rocking cargo shorts on the golf course got MJ kicked out of a round yesterday.The worst part is that this is actually mild for an MJ outfit violation.

Here’s a tip for Team Us if you are every buying a suit or jacket…under no circumstances should it almost touch the ground when you are seated. I mean Inspector Gadget thinks the jacket is a little long. Even Steve Harvey hit MJ with his tailor’s card. Talking about “you’re jacket is a little long, playa”.

Mj is so out of control, even Brand Jordan has lost their mind. They are making clothes no one would ever buy.

Someone give me ONE place this outfit works? Varsity football awards banquet when your letter jacket just isn’t enough? When you want to go to the club and intentionally want to try to not have them let you in at the door? This joint is the literal interpretation of “business casual”. Oh, and there is nothing hot about that Jordan lapel pin. Side note, having all three buttons going on this thing is a violation of all fashion rules, but I expect nothing less from MJ.

There there’s this.

I don’t know if MJ is taking a knee because he’s tired or because he just saw that turrible stitching and those bleached out creases on his jeans.

MJ is the worst dressed cat ever. He’s the only dude on the planet who could make Kobe Bryant’s All White Errythang, and those ridiculous shirts Russell Westbrook was wearing look reasonable.

Even if they switched outfits.

MJ, pull it together man. There are plenty of people to help you with your problem.

-Brock

Andrew Bynum Does The Impossible: He Just Got Worse

I thought the Andrew Bynum situation was horrible last week. It was so bad I had to address it. But the physical manifestation of Bynum’s “I don’t give a f*ck” reached all new heights. The hair was already stupid as just a normal fro. But for some reason, he decided to really take it to the next level and straighten it. Peep this.

Let’s go ahead and drop a come on bruh on that one. Is that pimp hair? Jim Carrey from dumb and dumber? Sultan from Great White Hype?

I know Andrew Bynum isn’t supposed to be healthy until January, and maybe he’s bored, but he clearly doesn’t give a damn about representing his team. Wait, maybe he is trying to be one of the greats. Maybe he is already ready to leave the Sixers and join another team…well, group really.

I hear they have a new album coming out.

-Brock