I’m working on another Man Up Monday article, but I couldn’t let this one go. It came in on a tip from the homey Turd Ferguson on the Facebook page. (That’s right, we’re everywhere) Why don’t you hit the page and hit me with a like? (http://www.facebook.com/UsvThem) It will make your whole life better. While you’re at it, hit up Turd Ferguson on his site by going to the link on the right, or clicking here.
Anyway, Yesterday on the way to the game LeBron James decided this was a good idea.
Here’s my thing. Women carry purses because they have a bunch of little stuff they need to have around. Mirrors, lipstick, makeup, crumpled up tissues, a piece of gum, about a billion of those club cards, keys to some shit they haven’t tried to open in 4 years, a safety pin, and a stain stick. That’s why they can’t find their phone when it rings even though it lights up and is in a space the equivalent to the size of a gallon ziplock bag.
Anyway, there is nothing a man carries that is the size to fit into a purse. We need a wallet (No George Costanza), a phone and the key to your car and the key to your house. If you need more than that, you’re going away for the weekend and you need the bag Dwyane is carrying. LeBron is rocking a purse that matches his belt. Which implies he has a selection of bags at the crib. In fact, that purse is so ridiculous that I’m not even talking about the fact that Dwyane is wearing white skinny pants and some high fashion Under Armour. I’m not even talking about that.
LeBron, Man Up and get yourself a man bag. Not a man bag like the murse you are rocking, a literal bag a man would carry. What you have now is not that. Step your game up.
Apparently that picture above is a fake. I was able to get a few of the interns to actually do some work today and they found the original. My bad.