Man Up Monday: New York Knicks

This is starting to feel like deja vu. But if the New York Knickerbockers are going to continue to embarrass themselves, I’m going to continue to talk about it.

Just to keep it real before I launch in here, let me acknowledge the fact that the Knicks are a lot better than they were next year. They have been really bad for that last 8 years or so. They made it through the Starbury era, the Isiah Thomas era, they bottomed out the squad to take a shot a LeBron and missed out on that, and now they have put all their chips in with Amare and Melo.

You know what? I actually don’t have a problem with the Knicks today. Sure, they got swept the hell up out of the playoffs faster than any other team in the league today. Sure, they let the no big man, old ass Celtics squad beat them down like they didn’t belong in the playoffs in the first place. But the Knicks are actually on the road back. They can actually fill up MSG, people actually care about the games, and they have a marketable star or two. I want to talk about Knicks fans though.

The Knicks fan is an extension of the New Yorker. I’m not talking about the celebrity Knicks fans who sit on the floor and barely pay attention. I’m talking about the average New Yorker. These are the most ridiculous people on the planet. They talk about NY like the rest of us give a damn, and they think their own situation is go great, that the rest of us have studies the intricacies of New York and are supposed to actually understand what they are talking about.

True Story:

I’m in New York, in Manhattan, literally on Broadway downtown walking around and ready to take the train uptown. It is summertime, so it is nice outside. People are wearing short sleeved shirts, women are in skirts. It is a great day in NY. So I start looking for the nearest train station and can’t find one and don’t see on e close. So I do what any rational person would do, I ask the nearest person for directions.

Brock: “Excuse me. Do you know where the train station is?”

NY: “Do I know where the train station is? What does my tattoo say?”

At this point I know I’ve asked the wrong person. I’m caught up in this New York attitude B.S. already.

Brock: “Uhhhh. The Bronx”

Yes, dude had a full forearm tattoo that said “BRONX” all the way up his arm.

NY: Dasrite son. I’m from the Bronx.

Brock: That’s great. What does that have to do with the question.

NY: I’m from the freaking Bronx, of course I know where the train station is.

[uncomfortable pause – literally and figuratively]

Brock: You gonna tall me or not player?

See, that’s the NY bullshit. Did this dude really rep his hood on walking directions to the train?

Which brings me to Knick fan.

You have to love the downward spiral they experienced over the last week and a half. From the Knicks actually being competitive. To Carmelo saying “all the Celtics did was hold serve on their home court”, to the full on bailout of the Knicks being better next year. Well, it will have to be next year because this year is over.

At this point, the Knicks fans are just rooting against the Denver Nuggets. I would be embarrassing it would be if the Nuggets made it farther than the Knicks. Luckily the Nuggets look like they will join the Knicks any day now.

Knicks fan…Man Up! You team still sucks, you still need at least one more piece, and at least two years before you will be competitive. So while the Knicks still suck, why don’t you go ahead and turn down the rhetoric. Thanks.

-Brock

 

Irony Defined: Carmelo Anthony’s new Nike commercial

Have you seen Carmelo’s new Nike Commercial?

Now I like the guy, and he is a beast on the court. But I know good and well Carmelo is not hitting the weight room. He definitely isn’t on some old Rocky type dragging bricks workout.carmelo.jpg

Look at that dude’s arms. Has he ever seen the weight room? The kid still has the babyface. He’s a great player because he is just better. He’s 6’8″ with speed and hops. The dude barely looks like he’s trying out there, but he’s still killing cats.

Even Allen Iverson is more diesel than that dude and he only weighs a buck sixty-five.

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Flex on em AI.

On the upside, Melo did wife up La La. Is she hot?

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Iiiiiontknoow homey. I’m gonna need to get a few more angles on that. But it ain’t lookin’ good. She’s no Ananda. She’s also no Free. She’s got Rocsi though.

-Brock

“USA-USA-USA” – USA Basketball back on top?

Kobe, LeBron, Melo, Dwight, this is why they’re hot.

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Listen, I know it’s relatively inferior competition, but you just have to love what the USA is showing us at the FIBA Americas Championship tournament in Las Vegas. Just like last summer, Carmelo is showing us why he’s one of the most complete players in the whole world.

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Homey is simply unstoppable, point blank. I mean, if you try to man him up with pressure D, he can put it on the floor and slash to the rim. If you try to lay off him, he’ll J you with that killer jumper. If you try to body him, he’s got that killer baseline turnaround game and when he’s really on his game, he’s a highly proficient rebounder, garbage bucket guy. He’s truly the perfect weapon. The only thing about him I don’t like is his seemingly mental midget status with that “stop snitchin” foolishness and of course, his random choice in lady.. La La.. don’t get me wrong, La La is cool..just too old for a cat who has no business being married before he’s 38. At any rate, Melo.. we here at UvT sports salute you.

LeBron has been LeBron, he’s dominating. He’s ubiquitous. He just muscles cats with that overly physical brand of play.

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I mean, he really is that King James cat. The crazy thing about LeBron is how much better he could be. His jumper is anything but consistent, he rarely uses his left hand and his D leaves plenty to be desired. Still, you gotta love what LeBron has done for Team USA.

Finally, the man who has made it all come together is Kobe. I mean, what can you say about Kobe Bryant that hasn’t already been said about . It’s just the best of the best.

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He brings crazy talent, work ethic, a jumper, killer D, swagger, attitude, I mean, dude is the best player in the world and it shows out there. Kobe just has that next gear that other cats don’t have. Honestly, I don’t see a need for Dwayne Wade when you have a Kobe out there who can score, pass it, and defend them. He threw a hot alley op to LeBron James in the first half of the Puerto Rico game. Unbelievable.

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Look, Dream Team these guys are not… and the international quality of play has increased exponentially. But I can honestly say with this team, USA has a good a chance as ever and should be a prohibitive favorite to bring home that Gold Medal in Beijing. Nice work fellas… Good lookin Coach K.