Eva Amurri: She Got It From Her Mama!

So I’m a dude who follows the J-game pretty closely. (read: very closely). You know, typical stuff like keeping a list in my head of the top players in the game. Hall of famers, 40-somethings, rookies, so forth. So when I heard that Susan Sarandon’s daughter was bout to pop up in a few skripping scenes on the show Californication, my curiosity was piqued. I mean… Susan Sarandon has put in some work in this here game:


She was bad back in the day, but how did it hold up?


(damn, Sue…)

But I had never really heard of her daughter, Eva Amurri. And wasn’t quite sure if the next generation could really bring the heat like that. So, like the good sleuth that I am, I dug in on the internets to find some info on the chick.


Ok, we might be working with something. But let’s just clarify this. Lil Mama can you help me out on this one?


Still curious. Let’s just zoom in for an angle 1, shall we?


OK, OK! We’re good to go here. [applause]. Unfortunately, young Eva has failed to even give us even an angle 1.5. And so far, the angle 1.2s don’t look promising. So I dug deeper. Now I wouldn’t know for sure, but I’m almost positive the Brits might have an extra NSFW look at this development. Yes. Yes, they do! [that is about a 4 on the NSFW scale. Ed.]

[Stone Phillips Voice]  But no one was prepared for what would come next…


Well, Eva, thanks for playing. Stay in touch. We’ll keep an eye out for you. But… no, baby. Don’t give me those doe eyes. You know your boy Slick still loves you. You’re still coming over later, right? m-Kay-bye. Ha. Fellas, just remember where she got it from. And that there are many, many ways to love your woman.


Sho ‘nuff!

-Slick Jefferson