Diddy and Dirty Money: Step Yo Game Up!

Yo, I’m a Diddy backer.  I really am.  Dude knows how to sell, especially himself.  But this Last Train to Paris/Dirty Money thing has me confused.  So Diddy has a new album coming called “Last Train to Paris“.  It was supposed to come out this month, but now it comes out next year.  It is a “Diddy” album, but he’s in a group called Dirty Money.  But Dirty Money is featured, but he’s also in Dirty Money.  But Dawn and Kalenna aren’t background singers…they’re just singing…in the background of the songs.  And the album isn’t by Dirty Money, it is by Diddy.  And they like to dress in black and white.  And Diddy is singing on the album, sometimes in Auto-tune…sometimes not so much.  At first I thought this was gonna be hot.

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I see you Dawn.

Then the music started to drop.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCK0ohoTvbk

Even Biggie doesn’t know why he’s on that track. B.I.G. how do you feel about Puff’s singing on that joint?

notorious-big

I don’t know either.

Then the “look” started to fall apart.

Dawn Dirty Money

Now you know I’m a Dawn Richard supporter.  But, errrrr, uhhhhhh, this is not a hot angle for ol girl.  The bangs ain’t workin, that stomach, J Combo ain’t what she needs to be enhancing.  Also, another question…if Diddy is always on top of cats for not appreciating their opportunities, asking why people can’t stay up all night for their dream, making them sacrifice everything to get what they want, why can’t he make this chick Kalenna smile for a picture?

dirtymoney

She is always sitting there looking like she was dating Diddy and found out he’s got another baby’s momma.  I mean, Eliot Spitzer’s wife thinks she needs to cheer up.  I mean Wayne had two babies a week apart and Lauren London and Nivea still managed to muster up a smile.  Diddy is pulling Kalenna from R&B obscurity, the least the chick could do is act like she wants to be there.

diddy_dawn

Seriously, this picture should be captioned “What do you mean Diddy is paying himself back with my advance money?”  The chick refuses to crack a smile.  Watch this…Kalenna, you just won the lottery!

kalennaharper

That’s all she’s got right there.  She’s elated.  Can she at least pretend like she enjoys being in the group, like she enjoys having a job?  I hope the music gets better too.  When that “Come To Me” came out a few years ago it was a BANGER.  I ran that joint back to back for weeks.  I’ll still rock it right now.  That “Love Come Down“?  I’m trying to run it through the system to see if I sticks, but so far it isn’t making the cut.

Diddy, I know you are going to keep working right up until the deadline, get Timbo or Kanye or someone to cook you up a beat and get Shyne on the track and drop a hot ass single.  OK?  Do it for the people.  I know you are trying to be ground breaking but that can go both ways.  Do you want to be Andre 3000 “The Love Below“, or do you want to be Eddie Murphy “Party all the Time“?

Your choice Diddy, your choice.

-Brock

Comments

  1. Shyne guest appearing with Diddy? No way homie. Shyne is tryin to kill Diddy, plusss they want to deport my man back to Belize. Diddy’s security is at an all time high right now cause everyone knows, Shyne was the last of the Bad Boys of the “Bad Boy” era.

    -Olls

  2. since bigs died, puff has been a steady -1…

    decent producer, awful artist and even worse actor.

  3. Dis nicca album gonna be hot garbage…just leak some more Cassie nudes and sell cologne (i gotta admit that he has magnificent man scents, no homo).